The Edification of Grell Sutcliffe
by tsusami
Summary: Sebastian is annoyed, Grell wants to make it up to him and Ciel is only too willing to help him. Grell x Sebastian, sort of.


**Written for Zephyriko**

**The Edification of Grell Sutcliffe**

Sebastian Michaels had one word for Grell Sutcliffe: incompetent. He didn't believe anyone could possibly be less adept at his job than the three bumbling fools his master had hired out of sympathy, but Grell was very close to convincing him. Grell's tea was appalling, his table-side manners made Maylene look sufficient at something and his tendency to over apologize in place of fixing things was remarkably annoying.

Sebastian truly despaired over the state of the Barnett household.

Sebastian dotted every i and crossed every t on the list of items he was writing down. Thanks to Grell's help with the laundry, their current linens were dyed an impossible shade of red. Grell either had a future as an unemployed laundress or a brilliant career in textiles. Sebastian hoped he would pursue the latter and get out of his hair. Sebastian put down his pen and lifted the parchment. He looked over his list carefully and gave a quick nod.

Still, it was rare to find a reaper parading around as a human. Apparently the reaper, for all his observation of human life, was not so adept at learning.

Sebastian's left hand pulled out a silver pocket watch. A glance at the time prompted him out of his chair and down to the kitchen at a much more rapid pace than usual. Thanks to Grell, he was behind schedule, again and he did not feel encouraged by the yelling that greeted him before he could open the door. Pushing the kitchen door open, Sebastian paused. Bard angrily leaned over the table, flame thrower in hand, while a panicked Grell held tonight's dinner out of reach.

"Bard, Grell," Sebastian said. Both men froze and turned sheepishly towards the door. Bard's angry look slowly melted into relief.

"Sebastian! I've been trying to fix dinner, but this guy won't let me near the meat!" Bard pointed at Grell accusingly.

Sebastian turned to Grell, waiting for him to explain, but the sheepish butler looked at the bundle in his hands and quickly lowered it. He smiled nervously, shifting eyes from Bard to Sebastian.

"Is this true?" Sebastian prompted.

Grell's eyes dropped to the floor. "But he wanted to torch the meat and I thought... it's such a _lovely_ shade of red it would be a shame..."

Sebastian tried to maintain a friendly smile. His mouth quivered with the effort.

"Thank you for your concern, but we cannot serve the young master uncooked food and if we don't start soon, dinner will be late. Mr. Sutcliffe, please hand me the meat. I'll cook it. Bard, please start the side dishes and Mr. Sutcliffe, please keep Tanaka company. Make sure he has enough tea." Both men stood up a little straighter.

"Yes sir!" they said in unison. Sebastian watched Grell place the wrapped meat on the table before scampering out of the doorway. The head butler returned his attention to the meat on the table and gave a small sigh.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Ciel looked over the latest figures and narrowed one blue eye. Toy sales were steady, but the candy sales were slightly down. Ciel would have to talk to Sebastian about new flavors for the season. He jotted down a few notes when he heard the door creaking open. It was his aunt Angelina's butler, Grell, he thought, trying to remember the name of the surprisingly clumsy butler. He thought his aunt had better taste than that.

Ciel wrote comments in the margins and underlined the parts he needed to discuss with his banker. He kept a watch on the sheepish butler making his way across the room in his peripheral vision.

"I thought I assigned you to helping Sebastian," he said.

Grell halted, arching his back like a cat.

"Se... Sebastian told me to check on Tanaka, to... to.. to make sure he has enough tea."

A small smile formed on Ciel's lips. "Is that so?" Ciel underlined another figure. "Tanaka will be fine," he said of the elder man sitting seiza style on the floor. Grell was awkwardly kneeling on the floor next to him, trying to copy him. He tucked his legs underneath him, paused, shifted again with a sort of frown marring the corner of his lips. Ciel smirked as Grell discovered how uncomfortable it was. "Sebastian must be terribly busy. I'm certain your help would be appreciated much more in the kitchen." Ciel glanced up, noting Grell's rigid posture and the hands wringing themselves repeatedly in his lap. "Don't you agree?"

"I... I just came from the kitchen," he said. The confusion worked it's way through his voice. "Sebastian asked me to take care of Tanaka. To make sure he has enough tea..." Grell glanced at the full cup of green tea steaming from between Tanaka's hands.

"Speaking of tea," Ciel put down his pen and reached for the braided cord hanging against the wall, "why didn't you bring any?" Ciel tugged the cord once and then twice. He leaned back in his cushioned chair and glanced sidelong at the butler sitting on his blind side. He sniggered and picked up his pen. The scratching of the nib against the parchment sounded loudly in the quiet room.

Grell wisely chose not to answer.

Sebastian was prompt in bringing the cart and tea. "Pardon the intrusion," he said, pushing the wheeled cart next to the desk. Ciel put his pen down and settled into his chair. He noted Sebastian's quick glance at Grell who maintained his position kneeling on the floor. Grell looked up at Sebastian with a dreamy sort of faraway look in his eye and a tender smile. Sebastian paid no heed to the presence in the corner. He placed the painted Wedgewood cup in an empty spot above Ciel's parchments. He picked up the pot gingerly and began pouring carefully. "Today I have prepared hot sencha. It should help the young master stay alert during such a busy time. For a snack, I made a Japanese treat called daifuku. The sweetness of the red bean Lau was kind enough to send should complement the unusual bitterness of the tea."

"I asked for something with chocolate," Ciel said. He eyed the white powder puff being placed next to his tea with suspicion.

"Young master will have chocolate in his dessert. Too many sweets isn't good for children," Sebastian smiled.

"Che," Ciel turned away. He returned to the figures on white paper. "When you have a moment, we need to discuss new flavors. Your brilliant milk candies are not selling. I told you it was silly. Save the milk flavors for your precious cats." Ciel chose to omit that Sebastian's other suggestion, the strawberry flavor, was now their most popular.

"Yes, master. I will tend to business after the dinner hour." He bowed and returned to the cart, wheeling it out just as quietly as he had entered.

Ciel pinched the delicate bone china handle and took a sip of the steaming tea. He wrinkled his nose, sniffed it a little and sipped a little more. Sebastian had left no milk or sugar, meaning it was served as it was meant to be consumed. He picked up the odd wooden wedge left beside the daifuku and cut into the powdery pastry. With no fork on hand he speared the small piece he had cut and placed it on his tongue. Ciel chewed and his eyebrows lifted. He nodded to himself appreciatively.

"Um, excuse me?" a timid voice spoke up. Ciel glanced over at Grell who he had almost forgotten was there. "Did I hear that Sebastian had a fondness for cats?"

Ciel wrinkled his nose. "He loves the mangey things. He meets his beloved stray every morning in the garden when he thinks no one is watching." Ciel took another sip of tea. He tilted his head when he noticed Grell's dreamy far away look take over. "You're not a cat fanatic too, are you? I forbid anyone from bringing one into the house."

Grell shook his head emphatically. "But Sebastian truly is a kind man, isn't he?" Grell clasped his hands together and held it against his chest. Tanaka chuckled next to him. Ciel watched the butler carefully. Sebastian's assignment, the short temper earlier and his absolute refusal to acknowledge Grell's presence in the room was starting to suggest more than tad annoyance.

Ciel leaned forward on his right arm. "Is Sebastian angry with you?" he asked calmly. Grell's back straightened immediately. His eyes turned wide as Maylene's glasses. "You wouldn't be the first servant to get on his bad side. Finnian, Bard, and Maylene do so on a daily basis." The corner of Ciel's mouth quirked up. "But they also know how to get back on his good side."

Grell's ears picked up.

"Sebastian's love of cats is common knowledge in the manor," Ciel continued. He eased back into his chair and folded his hands in his lap. "Whenever they make him angry, the beg his forgiveness dressed up as a cat." Grell's head wheeled to look at him. "The more convincing a cat they are, the more willing he is to forgive." Ciel tried to recall where they had put away Elizabeth's latest gifts. He was certain they were locked away in Sebastian's pantry, where no one would have to see them again. "I can tell you where they hide the costume, if you would like to try it."

Ciel looked over at the butler and tried not to flinch back. His mouth hung open in a smile that spread from ear to ear. "Oh gracious lord," Grell said, clasping his hands against his chest in supplication, "I would be most grateful."

Ciel forced forced down the bubbling of glee and reached for the master key in his pocket. "You'll need this for the butler's pantry." He held up the small brass key in the air.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Sebastian put down the knife in his hand and glanced at the wall of bells. The bell to Ciel's study jangled in two long bursts as was his custom. Sebastian wiped his hands on his white apron, picked at the strings at his back and put the apron on the table. "What does young master want now?" he thought, putting on his coat.

When he re-entered the study, he noted Grell's absence from the corner. His eyes darted around suspiciously, but the shinigami's presence was absent from the room entirely.

"You rang?" he said pleasantly, noting the nearly empty cup on the desk and the half eaten daifuku. Ciel glanced up from his work and paused.

"I need a piece of information from the merchant's account books. I would retrieve it myself, but I do not seem to have my key."

Sebastian's eyes narrowed just barely. "If the young master can tell me what account he is interested in, I have the contents of the account book memorized."

"The book will do. And if you could check the number of silver pieces we have left... particularly the knives?" Ciel's head bent over the parchment on his desk and began scanning its contents.

Sebastian noted the smug expression his master was trying to hide. His eyes darted back to the empty spot next to Tanaka. "I understand," Sebastian said. He turned on his heels and excused himself.

It was not a surprise when he rattled the knob to the pantry door and discovered it was open. Sebastian pushed the door open cautiously, eyes darting across the room and noting a surprisingly large lump in his bed. Not that he used his bed, but it was disconcerting nonetheless. Sebastian entered the pantry and shut the door before the other servants could witness this.

Grell Sutcliffe was curled up in his bed wearing kitty ears and a tail. Upon his entrance, Grell leaped onto all fours and wagged his hips excitedly. Sebastian was fairly certain he could thank Lady Elizabeth for the costume pieces, but he had a feeling it was his Lord he could thank for Grell's presence here.

"Sebastian!" Grell exclaimed, leaping off the bed. He crawled awkwardly along the wooden floor and rubbed a cheek against Sebastian's leg. Sebastian suppressed a cold shiver that ran down his spine. "Forgive me!" Grell exclaimed, curling his body against the same pant leg. Sebastian stepped away smoothly and grabbed the master key that had been left on the table. He pocketed the small item in his coat.

"Please Mr. Sutcliffe, stand up. You will dirty your uniform."

Grell lowered his head, leaning on his forearms while his rear with the attached cat tail stuck up in the air. "Meow?" he asked. He tilted his head to the side and gazed at Sebastian with wide, doe like eyes. "Mrow," he practically chirped, rolling over to his side and striking a pose of submission. Sebastian's eye twitched.

"Real cats have a little more dignity Mr. Sutcliffe. Now would you please get off the floor? Or if you insist on rolling around the floor do so outside the manor."

Grell sat up a little straighter. Sebastian kept one eye on him while he walked calmly towards the counter drawers and pulled out the collection of loose leaf pages that composed the merchant's account book. He doubted his master needed it, but orders were orders.

Sebastian sensed Grell's presence moving towards him at a rapid pace. He moved to side step him but the shinigami proved suprisingly quick. Grell bowled into him, effectively knocking him over and the account book flew from his hand fluttering to the floor. Sebastian paused, stunned while Grell's heavy body pinned him down.

"But Sebastian, you must forgive me, you _must_. I'll do anything you ask if you'll only forgive me for being so much trouble." Grell raked fingers over Sebastian's chest, like a cat pawing a toy. Sebastian tried hard to mask his disgust. He placed two hands on Grell's shoulders and tried to push him away, but Grell pushed back, rubbing his cheek, which he now noticed had thin whiskers drawn in black, against his coat. "And after the young master told me you were weak against cats..."

Sebastian paused. His eyes flared open in the briefest moment of surprise. His face relaxed and slowly a smile formed.

"But sir, I am quite weak against cats. This however, is very dog-like behavior." Grell's face popped up in surprise. His lips formed a surprised o. "Cats are very graceful, dignified creatures. They do not bowl over gentlemen or interrupt their work. They do not wag their tails obscenely." Grell sat up, but did not move from his position atop Sebastian's hips. He seemed to contemplate his performance. "Cats are very gentle creatures. They allow their masters to come to them and not the other way around. They are not submissive creatures like the dog." Grell nodded, though his blank eyes were still pondering something else. "I can instruct you on how to be a very convincing cat, if you'll allow it." Grell's face lit up with a big smile. "But first you must get off of me," Sebastian smiled tensely.

Grell finally seemed to realize his position and with a brilliant flush of his face he scrambled off his position atop Sebastian and kneeled on the floor, awaiting further instruction.

"Teach me, master," he said passionately. Sebastian felt another cold shiver slice up his spine. He brushed himself off, fixed his clothing and picked himself up from off the floor.

"First, you must not lift a finger." Sebastian picked up the merchant's account book which had landed awkwardly on the floor. He tried to fix the bent pages, smoothing them out until he was satisfied. Grell's face was set in a grim sort of determined look. He nodded to the first condition.

"You must curl up in a comfortable spot and do nothing but nap, occassionally stare out a window, if one is conveniently located nearby, and keep yourself clean." Grell looked down at his clothes and noted the state of his uniform. He mouth dropped down in horror while his gloved hands quickly pat at the dusty spots, trying to wipe himself clean.

"The young master needs my assistance, but if you would like to curl up on that bed and rest leisurely upon it, why not a person in this house would mistake you for a butler."

Grell darted for the bed and curled himself up into a ball. "Like this?" he asked, curling his hand together against his chest like two small paws. Grell's eyes gazed out at him dreamily above the light flush on his cheeks. The edge of Sebastian's mouth twitched.

"It is much more convincing. I feel quite compelled to reward you with a bowl of cream." _If only to shut you up_, he thought. Grell licked his lips a little too slowly and for the first time, Sebastian thought he understood what it meant to be physiclly ill. "Stay just like that and I will come visit you when I have a spare bit of time."

Sebastian held onto the book and backed away slowly. The silver could always wait until later. He didn't think the young master was all that interested in it anyways. Sebastian kept a careful eye on Grell all the way to the door. He reached the handle when Grell suddenly sat up.

"Wait!" He held out a gloved hand. "Won't," Grell hesitated, looking down shyly while a coy smile formed on his lips. The flush was back on his cheeks. "Won't you ... pet me before you go?"

The hand holding the account book clenched around the book tight enough to make a dent. Sebastian forced the near frown into the hint of a smile while he clenched the fingers of his other hand repeatedly. He reminded himself he had done worse things in life.

"Of course," he said tersely, walking back slowly to the straw mat where Grell quickly rolled back onto his side and formed the curled up ball with his body. He wiggled on the bed excitedly.

Sebastian held out his fingers hesitantly and Grell stopped wiggling and stuck up his head. His chin pointed into the air, raising his face to the white hand held just inches above him. Sebastian reached for the face black ears and rubbed them the way he did with his beloved every morning. Grell pushed himself higher and caught the pad of Sebastian's palm with his cheek.

Sebastian paused, tensing every muscle in his hand. It was all he could do to fight the strong urge to pull away. Grell rubbed his cheek against the glove affectionately, dirtying the white cloth with whatever rudimentary makeup he had used to draw the whiskers. Sebastian could feel the heat of his cheek through the material. He was much warmer than a normal human.

Grell's closed eyes opened slowly. He gazed at Sebastian with green eyes half lidded and clouded in an expression Sebastian attributed with causing the twisting feeling in his stomach. "Don't you want to stroke my hair?" Grell purred.

Sebastian snatched his hand back. He paused, reached towards Grell hesitantly and pat his head two times with the barest contact between his gloved fingers and the smooth brown hair. "I must get back to work," Sebastian said. He scuttled out of the pantry quickly, looking back into the room with one real smile before closing the door.

Sebastian pulled out the master key from his pocket and inserted it into the keyhole on the pantry door. He turned the brass key, effectively locking the pantry from the outside.

He would have to thank his master for the well played interference later.


End file.
